The Sommelier

..when
the relatively youthful and decidedly hip Sommelier appeared and, with gay abandon,
she led the decision to place the nights drinking menu in his capable hands.
And why not? It is not called a wine room for nothing. He knew the list intimately,
having selected them personally, and given the criteria of an approximate maximum
price and ‘pinot-like but not pinot’ his choice was admirable. We
were educated into new taste sensations and the wines complimented the food
and rather enhanced the conversation as the evening and we four wore on. And
on. And on
The food was excellent and the service superb – actually one might use the word
joyful about it without being a complete prat. Not being too crowded we could
hear each other speak though I imagine that at other times semaphore might be
the only alternative when the multitude arrived simultaneously.
Being a licensed restaurant the wines, a 2011 Valpolicela Classico (Veneto)
followed by a 2009 Fattoria Colsanto Montefalco Rosso (Umbria) were not exactly
cheap clearing the $60 per bottle bar with dollars to spare. But were I to look
through the wine list I probably would have overlooked them and gone for something
that I knew but my horizons would have remained as far off as they normally
are. Given that the universe of wine is large it should be explored and who
better to lead you through it than your friendly sommelier?
Even whilst having drunk a large number of wines in my life something in the
way that I drink seems to destroy the ability to remember with the any exactitude
or detail the taste of what I drank. I have vague memories, but I have a better
recollection of the label in most cases. Or even the cases in all cases. Which
given that I tend to be more visually oriented is probably no surprise. I know
that I have consumed with great relish and appreciation (at the time) some fine
wines in my life time, but if asked to describe them in detail I would be reduced
into hirsute mumblings. Not for me the ability to taste a glass of wine and
confidently say that it was a 2002 Domaine Leroy Latricieres-Chambertin Grand
Cru just because that it was it tasted like. Apparently some people can and
I think that it would be a devilishly fine party trick.
I can confidently tell if a wine is red or white as long as I can see it.
I remember a wine loving friend inviting me to his birthday when only the best
wine was served, and I do remember that nothing was less than $300 a bottle,
that the champagne was an ancient vintage, that the Grange was good but was
overwhelmed by what I think was a Chris Ringland Shiraz that I described as
the vinous equivalent of being hit in the mouth by Mohammed Ali; and whilst
I remember that all the wine was superb I must confess that I remember the hangover
with a degree more clarity. Were I to have them again I would know them of being
similar to something that I had drunk in the past, but that would be about that.
The crucial thing with the sommelier is to be clear of your price point –
a difficult matter if you are wanting to impress somebody. Fortunately, in the
company I keep they know I’m an idiot so I don’t have to impress
anybody. You have to remember that in a licensed restaurant you are dealing
with mark-ups on the bottle that makes anybody in the slightest it familiar
with the depths of Dan Murphy’s shelves blanch with pain. I would think
that the 200% is the minimum price hike you can expect and a lot more is common.
Just get over it even though it hurts and at least double what you think you
would pay for normally – the restaurant needs to make a profit to stay
in business. It’s not an easy way to make money catering to the whims
of the populace.
But the greatest sommeliers have attained the accolade of Master Sommelier.
The training of a sommelier is extensive (and expensive) that only around 186
people have completed it. I cannot imagine my wife agreeing that I buy a dozen
assorted great Pinot Noirs of the world just for tasting purposes. We need a
new car more than that. The only Australasian to have attained these exalted
heights is Cameron Douglas who is a Senior Lecturer Above the Bar (sic) in charge
of the wine and beverage program at AUT University in Auckland although Michaël
Engelmann who grew up in France is the Head Sommelier at the Rockpool Bar &
Grill in Sydney would no doubt be at your service.
To achieve this exalted level of achievement he passed four levels of study
and testing, including blind tastings on each level. In the final test candidates
must correctly identify six different wines in twenty-five minutes wine – it’s
not enough to identify the grape variety, country of origin, district and appellation
of origin but back up the identification with reasons leading to the prognostication
Somehow I don’t think I need to apply.